


Telephonus Interruptus

by kathmak898



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Episode: s09e18 Sunshine Days, F/M, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-03-14
Updated: 2005-03-14
Packaged: 2019-04-28 04:12:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14441154
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kathmak898/pseuds/kathmak898
Summary: "Make it quick, Mon,” he winked. "Scully's calling at a very inconvenient time . . . ”





	Telephonus Interruptus

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Spooky Awards](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Spooky_Awards), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [SpookyAwards' collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/spookyawards/profile).

Title: Telephonus Interruptus  
Author: Kathmak  
Summary: "Make it quick, Mon," he winked. "Scully's calling at a very inconvenient time . . . " Spoilers: Slight references to "Sunshine Days." Rating: PG-13 (sexual situations)  
Archive: XFMU, Gossamer. Anywhere else, please ask first. Thank you! Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to me, unfortunately. So don't sue me, `k? Category: DRR; Romance, Fluff  
Notes: Tracy asked me to write a DRR fluff piece for her birthday, and I was listening to John Mayer around the same time. I heard "Your Body is a Wonderland," and I liked the sexy, playful feel of it. So, a little idea for a story was born. Happy birthday, Tracy! 

* * *

"Your Body Is a Wonderland" - John Mayer  
We got the afternoon  
You got this room for two  
One thing I've left to do  
Discover me, discovering you  
One mile to every inch of  
Your skin like porcelain  
One pair of candy lips and  
Your bubblegum tongue  
And if you want love, we'll make it  
Swimming a deep sea of blankets  
Take all your big plans and break 'em  
This is bound to be a while  
Your body Is a wonderland  
Your body is a wonder  
(I'll use my hands)  
Your body Is a wonderland  
Something 'bout the way your hair falls in your face  
I love the shape you take when crawling towards the pillowcase  
You tell me where to go and though I might leave to find it  
I'll never let your head hit the bed without my hand behind it  
Damn baby  
You frustrate me  
I know you're mine all mine all mine  
But you look so good it hurts sometimes

* * *

Telephonus Interruptus 

"Monica, hold still, will ya?" A muffled voice came from under the covers. "How do you expect me to do this when you're movin' around like that?" 

"Sorry, John, I can't help it," she gasped as she writhed on the bed . "You know that drives me crazy . . . uuuhhhhh." 

She felt like her body was on fire. All it took was the slightest touch from him, and she was a goner. An utter and complete goner. She had stopped pretending long ago that he didn't have this effect on her. That `I am a strong and independent woman and I don't need a man to validate my existence' crap went out the window the first time John Doggett put his hands on her. 

`Or maybe it was the first time he made eye contact with me,' Monica mused to herself. She fell hard every time she looked into those ethereal blue eyes of his. 

`Then again, it could have been the sound of his voice that sent me over the edge. He could turn me on just by reading me his grocery list,' she thought. 

Monica's out-of-body experience was rudely interrupted by the harsh ringing of the motel's cheap bedside phone. It was loud enough to wake the dead, but Monica barely heard it. There could have been a Metallica concert going on in the room next door for all she knew. 

"Is that the phone?" she murmured dreamily. 

"Dammit!" Doggett poked his head out from under the sheet, more than a little exasperated. "Who in holy hell would be calling now?" 

Monica found that she was able to think more coherently now that John had removed his tongue from her bellybutton. 

"I'd better get that," she stammered. John's hand reached the phone before hers. 

"Don't answer it, Mon," he drawled, and Monica couldn't help thinking that his voice sounded even deeper and more seductive than usual, if that was possible. "If it's important, they'll call back." He pleaded his case as he used his other hand to finger the silver heart-shaped necklace she wore. 

"Johhhhhn, it's probably Dana. She knows we're here in L.A. on this crazy Brady Bunch thing." Monica pulled herself up to a sitting position, and John smiled approvingly as the bed sheet dropped to reveal her breasts. "If I don't answer, she'll think something's wrong." 

He let out a disappointed sigh, knowing he wasn't going to win this one. His Monica was quite stubborn when she wanted to be. That was one of the things he adored about her. One of many things. Reluctantly he removed his hand from the phone. 

"Well, make it quick, Mon," he winked. "Scully's calling at a very inconvenient time. Tell her Agent Doggett was just about to put his mouth on your - " 

Monica silenced him with a finger to his lips and picked up the phone. 

"Hello?" 

"Agent Reyes? It's Agent Scully." A hesitant pause. "Did I catch you in the middle of something? You sound a little out of breath." 

"Uh, no. I was just . . . in the shower." John had taken her finger into his mouth and was now sucking on it vigorously. A little gasp slipped out of her mouth before she could catch herself. 

"Are you okay, Monica?" 

"I'm fine, Dana," she croaked, unable to disguise the shakiness in her voice. "What can I do for you?" 

"I'm flying into L.A. tomorrow. It sounds like you could use some help with the Oliver Martin case. I didn't think you and John would mind." 

Under normal circumstances, Monica would have been annoyed by Scully's condescending tone. But right now she was too busy trying not to notice that John's hand had disappeared beneath the sheet and was doing wonderful and naughty things to her nether regions. 

"Resistance is futile, beautiful," John whispered with an impish smile. Monica frowned in disapproval at him, but her body was saying something else. 

`John Doggett is a bad boy, indeed,' she thought. `Ah, but how could he be so good and so bad at the same time?' 

She was in the midst of pondering this all-important mystery when she realized that Scully was still on the other end of the phone. 

`Focus, Monica!' 

She tried to command herself to pay attention, but John was making it tough on her. He leaned in just close enough so his lips were brushing against hers, and Monica couldn't for the life of her make sense of what Scully was saying. All she could think about was how good John's mouth tasted when he kissed her. 

"So can you pick me up from the airport?" Scully asked. 

`Airport? What's an airport?' 

"Um, I'm sorry Dana, what did you just say?" 

"Honestly, Monica, I don't know where your mind is tonight." 

`My mind is on the fact that John's hand is between my legs, thank you very much.' 

Scully was clearly irritated. " I said I was hoping you that you could pick me up from the airport tomorrow morning. My flight arrives at 9:30. I tried calling Agent Doggett, but he doesn't seem to be in his room." 

`Agent Doggett is in bed with me, and he's just about to pound me into the mattress, so if you don't mind . . . ' 

"Of course, John and I will be there." 

John pulled his mouth away from hers and looked at her quizzically. 

"What?" he mouthed, but Monica just shook her head as if to say that she'd explain to him later. John shrugged and bent down to nuzzle her breast. 

"Just call me again in the morning when your flight gets here, okay? Gotta run. Goodbye, Dana!" 

Monica slammed the phone down and let out a moan that would have made a porn star blush. She grabbed his face and pulled it up to meet hers, trying to look angry but failing miserably. 

"John Doggett, you are so going to pay for that." 

"Promises, promises." There was that smile again, the one that always sent her heart rate soaring. 

Monica decided that no more phone calls would come between her and John that night. Stretching out an arm toward the night stand, she opened up the top drawer and unceremoniously dumped the telephone receiver into it. John's smile widened as Monica slammed the drawer shut and flicked off the light. 

"C'mere, John, and finish what you started." 

"Who am I to argue with a federal agent?" John asked, as he lifted the sheet and once again began the descent of her body. 

His deliciously deep voice was the last thing Monica heard as she closed her eyes and slipped back into a state of nirvana. 

  * Finis - 



  
  


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